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Interview with kinkster Boundtight85

“Serious, completely stuck, can’t get out, level of bondage”

Published on 6 June 2021

© Boundtight85

Hello Boundtight85, what does fetish mean to you? Can you describe what kind of effects it has on you, how do you feel, when you live out your fetish?
Fetish to me means lots of things but it mainly conjures a deep feeling of joy, enjoyment and identity for me. I have different feelings around fetish and playing that depend on the situation and person, as I’m sure most people do. There’s mainly the anxious but excited feeling, excited but nervous feeling and just excited feeling. All of which also provide a raging horny feeling! Each of these feelings derive from different elements of fetish or situations. For example, I feel anxious but excited usually when I’m meeting someone that I am comfortable with but this is the first time we’ve played or the first time I went to Quälgeist (in Berlin) or the MLC UnderGround (in Munich). Excited but nervous comes from the situation of meeting someone only after a good deal of chatting and we’re meeting in a public place for the first time to grab a drink and see if things click (which you should always do when meeting someone for the first time, for safety). Then there’s the plain excited feeling that comes from playing with someone familiar that I know and trust well.
Fetish for me is the love of bondage, gear, leather, rubber, fun scenes and scenarios. It’s when I get to completely let go and let the Dom or my play partner take over, pushing my limits as we explore the adventure together. The excitement of this is finding where my limits are and just how far I can go past them, be it, bound up a lot longer than I anticipated and left there, the breath control scene which really makes me struggle or just knowing I’m so completely “fucked” and helpless, I must relax so I don’t freak out because I know my Dom or play partner is watching out. The mental (as well as physical) release is amazing and I joke it’s better than therapy!
While fetish is a large part of who I am, it is not all I am. Like peeling back an onion, there are many layers that make me who I am but fetish is a crucial element and important to me as a fulfilled gay man.

© Boundtight85

Can you describe situations and how you felt, when you discovered your fetish for the first time?
The first time I discovered my interest in fetish was very early on. I would say 13-14 years old. Before that I was always drawn to playing the tie up games with my friends as we were kids being kids but then, later on, it kind of clicked why I enjoyed it. One day I was on the relatively new internet and ran across some pictures of guys in jockstraps. Being a hockey player, I’ve always found that very sexy so I started searching for more and then before I knew it, I ended up on the old gearfetish.com. Mind blown…. I couldn’t believe it and it answered all of my initial questions of, “Is this interest normal?” “Are there other guys into the same stuff?” “Oh wow, yes, I really am gay!” It was so eye opening for me and I’ve been on my journey since. For the record, I did not interact with anyone really until I turned 18 though, based on common sense and the law but I did spend a lot of time exploring.

© Boundtight85

On your pics one can see you enjoy bondage. Can you describe what you like about it? Can you tell us how you feel when you’re in a bondage situation?
Bondage is the single biggest fetish I have and I’m talking serious, completely stuck, can’t get out, probably freaks out most people, level of bondage. While I really enjoy gear like rubber, leather, sports gear, wetsuits, etc. I really enjoy the bondage element more than anything. I’ve never really dived into the reasoning why I enjoy it so much, some things are best left not understood so I don’t overthink it but I do love it. I can speak to what I enjoy about it though… being a pretty low key person, I really enjoy that complete loss of control and being held for the enjoyment of my captor. There is something so completely relaxing and almost therapeutic to me about being bound up, unable to move and just having to surrender everything! I can enjoy bondage in any state too, clothed, naked, in gear, completely covered in gear, all of it. As long as it is real bondage (more than just a single rope or piece of duct tape) and I know I cannot get out, then it’s great for me!
When I’m being put into bondage, I love the rush of the layering or growing loss of movement. Being strapped into that straitjacket, ankles restrained and finally, that hood and gag going on is a huge rush for me! Then comes the slightly panicked feeling once I struggle a little and realize the limits of what I’m in and think about how I can get out, if I can. After that, comes the relaxation phase where my mind drifts and I get into my subby headspace and that is when I finally find a level of nirvana. It’s not all about relaxation though, I also enjoy stress positions, being pushed physically and mentally as well as just not knowing what’s going to happen next. One of the most anxious feeling scenes I’ve had was in Munich at the UnderGround when my friends and I were at a party there and they pushed me into two locals who strapped me into a heavy duty bondage chair and left me on display for the bar to enjoy. Hints, my screen name being what it is.

© Boundtight85

What kind of conflicts did or do you have during your journey through your fetish discovery?
The single biggest conflict has been when do I “come out” again. Being gay, most of us live through a general coming out phase. Being kinky, that is a whole other level of coming out as well so the debate always rages in my mind of who do I need to tell and is there acceptance within this space for what is a very large part of who I am. I’ve told some straight friends, a lot of my gay friends but it is always interesting to see how it is taken when I say it.
The other element has been relationships. It is really difficult to find a kinky, like minded life partner for most people. I’ve been in a non-kink/fetish centered relationship for 5 years now but it by no means takes away from my happiness or joy of fetish play. My partner is very open and comfortable with me continuing to explore my interests in fetish and play with others I trust (safely) but I didn’t go into this relationship knowing that. As Dan Savage puts it, we’re both GGG (good, giving and game). It was a bit of a leap of faith, sharing my desires and interests with someone who isn’t kinky. At the end of the day, I kind of like having the separation of my fetish interests and heavy bondage fantasies separated from my daily life… it makes it more special and stimulating, in a way.

© Boundtight85

Please describe one of your hottest experiences concerning fetish you had so far?
While I’ve been fortunate to have a lot of great and exciting experiences. One of my hottest experiences was the weekend that I spent completely captured and played with a few years ago. How it all started, I was on a solo vacation a couple years prior to this experience and I was passing through Seattle. I randomly messaged this kinkster who lives there and that I had only spoken to a handful of times before but who is pretty well known. Surprisingly, he messaged back and said we should meet up! We met and that evening I ended up stripped, hogtied and hooded in his basement. You could say we hit it off!

Fast forward, we planned an entire weekend in his well equipped play space. I had only spent one overnight experience in bondage before so this was relatively new for me still. He picked me up when I got to town, took me back to his place and had the straitjacket, restraints and hood laid out on the couch in the living room. I took my shoes off and he immediately strapped me in and I had this feeling that washed over me of just how fucked I was! The weekend was spent in various forms of bondage from the straitjacket and sleepsack to cuffs, rope and a cage. At no point, from the start, was I not restrained in something until the very end and it was amazing! I lost track of time, sleep and it is amazing how you don’t even feel overly hungry while at that level of continual excitement. By the end of it, I was exhausted (in a good way) and drained and had the biggest grin on my face that you can imagine. A weekend of heavy bondage, electro, edging, plugs, milking and torment with a close and dear friend was one of the most amazing things I’ve done.

Whats your favourite kinky session noise?
That is a REALLY hard question… It is either the sound of the leather creaking or the sound of duct tape being ripped off the roll and applied. Both of those sounds and smells snap me right into my subby headspace.

© Boundtight85

Please describe a phantasy you have of what you want still to experience in the area of kink play
Something that I’ve never experienced but have always wanted to do is a kidnapping scene with some serious long term bondage. The idea of being snuck up on or tricked and just grabbed (i’m only 5’8” and 180lbs so i’m not the biggest guy in the world), cuffed, gagged, hooded and taken somewhere for a long weekend of torment would be amazing but terrifying at the same time! The idea of losing that kind of control and being held and used by my captor is really exciting to think about.

Boundtight85, thanks for this interview!

Follow Boundtight85 on Instagram and on Recon

(Interviewer: Michael)

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